Thursday, December 31, 2009

Anna Pulled a Me

I so often don't think that Anna is like me, until her last week of school before break. And then she proved that she is more like me than ever! God love her. I laughed until I had to lay on my side and gasp for air.
She informed me that it was terrible to laugh at someone else's suffering. I just laughed harder.On with the story......(And I didn't do it this time!)......
Anna and so many of her class mates are having a terrible time in Anatomy. She is an honor roll student and she fought hard for a C-. One of Anna's friend's who is a straight A student got a D- in the class. He is one of those teachers that doesn't believe in handing out good grades. I won't even get started on him. But Anna and the group were complaining and Anna was being a little loud. This she gets from me! And her voice travels. Anyways, her Anatomy teacher and two other teachers were close enough to hear big mouth.
So Little Ms. Anna got called to the office after the class. Her guidance teacher wanted to have a talk with her. It seems that Ms.Anna said she was going to off herself because of Anatomy. And one of her friends offered her a length of rope! It is state law that any teacher hearing some child talking about sucide needs to be reported. So Anna had to have a talk about sucide. Her guidance councelor knows Anna and has been helping her look for scholarships so she knew it was just a stupid comment. Suicide is not a laughing matter and I'm glad that the school is so involved. But having a huge mouth is a laughing matter!!
I welcomed her to the world of stupid comments. I live there.
Thanks for stopping over,
PS-I can't wait to ring in the new year! I hope that 2010 has less problems than 2009!

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

I'm going to roast for this one.
This is one of the pictures that yahoo has when you log on to your account. This picture has bothered me for so long! I'm obviously the only one that sees this. But why does it look like Na Naw is grabbing his junk? And the poor thing has a look on his face like he is just trying to find a happy place and show no emotion.
And these are the things that I think about. Sad!
Thanks for stopping by for a dose of perversion,

Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I'm Hard!

I know it's hard to tell but this is a picture of the first hard copy of my book! Now if I could make more than $.56 on it, all would be great. I know that this is just a silly little hobby but I still get such a rush from touching it.
Thanks for stopping by,
PS-It's my birthday and I'm turning 21!! Sorry about the short post but I'm going to go order my first drink at the bar. What it's my birthday and if I want to be delusional, I can!

Monday, December 28, 2009

What the ****?

I'm just asking but I'm pretty sure on this one. Isn't there a law against having to put two transmissions into two cars in the same year? Yup, I think there is a law against it. Anyways, Den turned the corner into our subdivision and it wouldn't go. And we are in the same boat as before, it has a new motor in it. So we are going to pay the $1400 and have it fixed. I figured out the costs of the white car. And even with the transmission, it has worked out to $80 a month for that car. It has been pretty good to us. I just hope that the black car ends up being that cheap after a few years. Right now with the transmission I think it works out to somewhere around $170 a month. That is kind of high but the majority was the $3000 we paid for it. The only good new is we have $1000 in the car fund. I hate to deplete it but at least we have the majority of it. Now, I pray, nothing else goes wrong until we can get more money in the fund. And I was so excited to start the year with that fund funded.
I can't wait to see what 2010 brings!
Thanks for stopping over,

Friday, December 25, 2009

Merry Christmas!

From my home to yours, I hope you have a Merry Christmas. I hope that Santa stuffs your stockings with everything you want!
I'll be back on Monday!
Thanks for coming to see me,

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Stuff my Stocking

So, if you could choose what it was your got for Christmas, what would it be?
My Unselfish Wish List
1.) The cure for cancer that all have access to
2.) The cure for AIDs that all have access to
My Selfish Wish List
1.) All my blog friends back
2.)Getting a book deal

I hope that Santa stuffs your stocking with everything you want! I wonder if Brad Pitt would fit in my stocking. Or could I just sit on his lap?
Thanks for stopping over,

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

Merry Christmas, almost!!! Go here ,if you want me to ruin it!
Burn in Hell with me,

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

A Dying Tradition

Here's a picture of the cookie plates that we are giving out. It has pecan sandies, chocolate chip cookies, crinkles, and banana bread on it. It's wrong to brag(with Santa watching) but it's far from sucking! We make cookies for days. I think we made over 400 cookies. I don't count in dozens because I'm not a baker. And just having to multiply everything by 12 puts me in an even worse mood.
Now this is where I'm going to sound like I totally don't get Christmas. I do get it because if you even knew how upsetting baking is in this quantity for me, I would get some slack. I don't want anything in return, I do this because I know it makes others happy. But I think in all of the years that we have been married, we have only gotten one cookie plate and that was from my mother in law. I don't want anything in exchange, really. I want to give out the plates as a gift. And they are always very well received. I often get calls thanking me because it went well with their Christmas dinner. But am I behind the times? Did I miss the memo? Were Christmas cookie plates canceled? I know that time is always an issue with busy families but when did the cookie plate go out of style? With everyone searching for purpose and longing for closer family bonds with the dying economy, why aren't the cookie plates making a come back?
Den and I both would hate to give up the cookie plate tradition. Well, maybe that is an overstatement. I'm kind of cranky when we make cookies and Den gets the brunt of it. So he would probably like to skip that part of the tradition. But otherwise, it seems that everyone is genuinely pleased to be on the receiving end. Or it could be that Den and I are a couple of old farts. Even though we are Gen Xers, I think we didn't get the call that cookies are a baby boomers tradition.
Do you get cookie plates?
Thanks for stopping over,

Monday, December 21, 2009

A quick Christmas Tip

I usually end up with quite a few Christmas cards. I set them on the kitchen table or the counter at first but then I end up having to take them down when ever I cook. Or I set them on the end tables in the living room and they end up getting knocked over by the cat. Or they make dusting a royal pain. So I have been stringing some curling ribbon between two push pins and just hanging the cards on that. It is so much easier. It's by the front door and I get quite a few compliments about my ingenuity. And when Christmas is over I just take the whole thing down.
Usually, my tips aren't as solid as this one. Since I'm still trying to repost everything that I deleted, I'm getting a refresher on what I wrote. I'm nuts! Seriously think before you take any of my advice!
Thanks for stopping over,

Sunday, December 20, 2009

Ginger Porn

So I left Den and DJ to work on the gingerbread house. That was were I made a mistake. I heard DJ laughing really hard and it was quite a naughty laugh. But I thought, "How sweet is that." I'm an idiot! Look closely at the picture below. This is what Den does with ginger bread men and women!
I just want to know why his eyes are bulging! The depths of depravity in this house have no bounds!
Thanks for stopping by,

Friday, December 18, 2009

Friends Friday!

I'm going to keep doing the Friend's Friday and just repost all of you! So for always being a good sport and not letting me corrupt you (yet) I pick A.Marie! You are a good booger!
Have a great weekend,

Thursday, December 17, 2009

I Forgot!

I forgot to post this one!! I took this the beginning of December. This is probably one of the most amazing pictures I've taken! I bet A.Marie will get it. For everyone else in warmer climates, this is the most wonderful thing ever. I was able to harvest some parsley and green onions. It should have been covered in yucky snow but it has been so warm here that everything was still growing. Mind you not anymore, it's snowed and been super cold. But still to harvest something the beginning of December on the IL/WI border, I don't think it has ever been done. Have I said that I hate cold before? I just wish the entire winter would stay warm.
Thanks for stopping over,

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!
This is a picture from a calendar Anna has. I love it!
Thanks for stopping over,

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

A Question

This is one of the pots from Donna's party. We filled it with ice and put bottles of pop in it. I was told that all soda is pop. I have some family from the southern IL and they say everything is a Coke. So the conversation goes like this, "Would you like a Coke?" "Sure" "What kind?" "A Coke is fine" Eye rolling and loud exhale "Yes, but what kind of coke?" "They have more than one kind of Coke?" "Northerners!"
Anyways, Donna said when she was a kid her mom always cooked beans in a pot just like this. Den said that this is a camping pot. Does anyone know? I just wanted it because I thought it was cute. It was calling to me "Burn something in me!" I'll let you know what I destroy in my new pot. Or is it a kettle?
Thanks for stopping by,

Monday, December 14, 2009

Donna's 60th shindig!

My mother in law just turned 60 and we threw a party for her. She really didn't want a party but we went all out for my father in law so we would have looked pretty bad if we did nothing for her. So anyways, we threw a "Barthday purty" for her. She is from the south and wanted something fun. I thought that it might be a bit offensive but she said it wasn't because she was from the south. Everyone had fun and Den's uncle came as Larry the Cable Guy. We took some pictures but it was so dark that only a few came out.
We had a basket of peanuts, moon pies and cow tails on every table.
That's Anna and DJ with their cousin Laura.
This is the outhouse that Donna made from a refrigerator box. We told her we would make everything but she wanted too make the stuff. She said it was fun and kind of took over. But it worked out better that way because I'm not creative at all.
She even made a back drop for pictures(that didn't come out). She painted an old house on four large poster boards. She even made the feed bags. I did help her but not enough.
There's DJ in the shitter.

And another picture of the house. This was a super cheap party because everything was used or we(Donna) made. I hope that I didn't offend anyone, Donna's family loved it. We even had people peaking their heads in just to see all of the decorations.
Thanks for stopping over,

Friday, December 11, 2009

Friend's Friday

Well for this Friday, my booger is......All of us. Yeah, I know weak! I've got to get out there and start to find everyone again. Have a great weekend!
Thanks for stopping over for such a pathetic post,

Thursday, December 10, 2009


Well, this is the John Holmes of Snowmen! Sorry A.Marie, its just my life. This was in retaliation for the penis on the neighbor's car the other night! I'm just so thankful that Den slept on the downstairs couch and woke up at 4am and took it all down. It's just a matter of time before Antioch's finest come knocking on our door with a ticket for obscene Christmas decorations.
I'll keep you posted,

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Good News?!?

Well the good news is Anna was accepted into Eastern Illinois University. The bad news is we have to pay for it. We should qualify for grant money but we can't really find out until the first of the year how much we get. So I will just panic until them. ;) I'm sure that I'm not the only parent that feels panic stricken when they find out their child has been accepted. Anna said she felt so relieved when she finally got the acceptance letter. And I had just the opposite reaction. The good thing is the school is super helpful and gave us all the info on grants and scholarships. And Anna has a cousin that is graduating in December from EIU that can help us find grants and scholarships. She is our ace in the hole until we figure this all out. I'll keep you posted on which corner I will be panhandling on.
Thanks for stopping over,

Monday, December 7, 2009

Good Times!

This is the dish soap that I got from the dollar store. It refuses to make bubbles. I think that even if you added really good dish soap to it, it would still refuse to make bubbles. But it smells amazing! So what good is dish soap that won't make bubbles and doesn't really cut through grease. It was killing me that I couldn't use it. I mean, me waste a $1. It wasn't going to happen. And then I came up with a plan.
We had a carpet cleaner a while ago but I killed it after a few years. I bought a super small one but it didn't do a good job. So right before Thanksgiving I bought one that was on sale. They say that you should wait a few weeks before you purchase something just to make sure that it is something that you really want/need. I waited a few years. I am also still waiting for a crock pot. Mine died a few years ago and I haven't replaced it. Making sure that you want something is a good thing but I may wait too long.
Anyways, back to the soap. I used the non bubbling soap and hydrogen peroxide to clean the carpets. I'm going into business! They looked so good and every room smelled amazing! I just filled the tank with hot water and put about a quarter cup of hydrogen peroxide and a good squirt of the soap in the tank. Or it could be that the carpets hadn't been cleaned in so long that anything is an improvement. But I'm sticking with my latest concoction as being the reason that they look so great!
If given enough time, I will re purpose anything!
Thanks for stopping over,

Friday, December 4, 2009

Friend's Friday

It's not that I don't want to pick a booger, it's just that there are only a few of us here and we are all good friends. All of you have already been my booger at one point or another. Have any ideas how to pick a new one.
Have a great weekend,

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Not Having Boundaries

I forgot to tell you about what I did in Florida. The kids were just reminding me of how weird I am and this little tidbit was referenced to prove their point.
When we got off of the plane in FL, we had to wait for the bus to bring us to our car rental. No problems there. But when we got on the bus, it was the four of us and this very sick man. He was sneezing and coughing. We were driving for a while and he had to just hang his head because he was in so much pain. Well, it was too much for me. I asked him where he was from and he was from Chicago. So I was telling him how I was so sick a few days before and we probably had the same thing. I told him how I managed to put myself back together with a bunch of pills. So I started to rummage threw my purse and pulled out some sinus pills and some cough drops with vitamins in them. Well, I guess it was just too much for my family. They were in hysterics. They started talking about me like I wasn't even there. Things like, "I knew it, I knew it. When he started coughing, I knew she would get involved. She will even drug strangers." were being said. I think the poor man was a little scared when they started referring to me as a witch. But I gave him a handful of drugs and wished him well on his trip. And then I reminded him to never take candy from a stranger just drugs. He thought it was really funny and then started popping the pills that I gave him.
I, once again, meant well, it was just an odd gesture. So if you ever spent time with me, DON'T COUGH!
Thanks for stopping by,

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

This is a Wicked one! Click here! A.Marie NO, NO, NO!!
Have a naughty day,

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Naughty Deer

These are the deer that we put out every year during the holidays. I won them when the kids were little and they just stuck around. The problem is they like to fornicate. We used to find it upsetting but it is happening so often that we are just used to it. When DJ was little he asked what they were doing and I said playing leap frog, they just weren't very good at it. Great parenting. Anyways, most mornings when DJ leaves for school, he calls back in the door, "They are at it again." And then he walks over and pulls them apart. The problem is the little kids bus stop is our driveway. And there has been quite a few mornings that I hear the kids giggling and I run out in the snow and pull them apart. UGH!
Now for the most part, our very comical neighbor is to blame. The houses are very close in this neighborhood. It's house, driveway, house. And the only houses here are ranches, raised ranches, and tri-levels. Sorry, got off subject a bit. Anyways, we moved in within a few weeks of our next door neighbors. Their son Alex was five and Anna was three. So the two of them have been together since they were very small. Our neighbors are another reason that we would be sad to leave. They are like family but the family that you look forward to seeing. Anyways, Anna decided to retaliate with some of her friends.
Yes, that is a three foot inflatable penis. I'm not sure where Richard came from. They have been passing him around amongst themselves for a while. And Anna signed it. Why, I have no idea. Really, have I taught her nothing! I was so sure that the someone was going to call the police on this one. Our road is the main road in the neighborhood. I was just waiting to explain that one. But everyone just stopped and laughed or drove passed a few times and took pictures.
I can't wait to see what the next chapter is in this drama. I worry that Anna has a naughty streak like her mother.
Thanks for stopping over,

Monday, November 30, 2009

Shroud of Torin

So often I think TMI. Why do I even bother to tell you the worthless crap that is going on in my life? Really, I wouldn't want to hear about it. But I just keep typing and you just keep coming back. Maybe something is wrong with all of us. Scary. Anyways, this is the shroud of Torin. You would think that something this precious would be locked away but no I have it. My dear husband, I lovingly refer to him as smart ass, named my towel. Yes, this is the towel that I wrap my clean hair in. Smart ass said that it has a thread count of 3 but I disagree. I feel that it is more of a woobie than a string. It's light and airy and it doesn't hurt my neck from the weight. So I'm thinking about asking for a hairdini for Christmas. I have cheap issues.
Thanks for visiting crazy,

Friday, November 27, 2009

Friends Friday!

I just wanted to say thank you all for finding me. You are all my friend on this Friday. Have a great weekend!
Love and gratitude,
If you are going shopping today, I hope you find some great deals!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Happy Turkey Day!

I hope that you are all having a wonderful Thanksgiving. I hope that you wore stretch pants today and that you still have room in them. That is really the best wish for all of us.
Just a reminder, if your are going shopping tomorrow you might want to look up everything tonight. So if you haven't joined swag bucks yet, now would be a great time. I'm doing really well with it. I'm making about $5 a week and that is a ton for a cheapy like me. Or should I say cheep cheep! Ok I'm a dork! So Hint, hint! If you use my link, I will love you even more!
Thanks for stopping over,

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Weird Wednesday!


I'm having a hard time finding just wicked clips so I'm going to change it up a bit and add some weird clips in there too! Have a great hump day!!
Thanks for stopping over,

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Disaster Preparedness

As some of you have noticed, I'm not one for a cheery outlook. I try to be upbeat but in the end it gets all messed up and then I come here to complain and you all pick me up. Seriously, who needs therapy when I have all of you. I know that I haven't been posting but that was pouting and a slight helping of depression. Don't tell my doctor about the depression because he would give me a laxative and put me in the psych ward. Anyways, the only good thing out of this is the fact that I backed everything up. It made it so much easier to get started. Remember all of the hours it took you just to get the lay out right. We all work so hard just to make it appealing. All the effort that we have all invested in our little world gone in a flash. UGH, typical! I learned the importance of backing everything up after my computer deleted a few dozen pages of my book. Just to let you know if that ever happens to you, it is perfectly acceptable to bang your head on the bed for as long as you want!
So my tip for the day is take a few minutes today and save everything to your hard drive and then disk or flash drive. Not only the articles but all the important info on your links. I like to save everything to my yahoo bookmarks as an added layer of protection(my cyber condom). That way if I lose the entire computer, I will at least be able to get to everything on line. If for some reason, I lose my yahoo account and my computer, I will still have everything on disk to get me started again. Trust me, I'm speaking from experience, there is no such thing as over kill in an emergency!
Thanks for sticking by me,

Monday, November 23, 2009

Thank You

I wanted to say a HUGE thank you to McVal for sending me these wonderful cookies. You really helped me. I guess I'll stick around for a while. I consider myself very luck to have you as a friend. God help you.
Much thanks,

I will rebuild

So I destroyed one of the things that I truly love. The old blog was nothing but good to me and I killed it. I was so mad at myself that I thought about throwing in the towel. Really, really! All that time and effort gone with the click of a button. It wasn't even the money that I lost(Yup, all my google money) it was the fact that it would take me forever to find all of you again. And then explain what a jackass I was. I can deal with embarrassment(as you all know if you have read any of my stories I pretty much live there). Anna was right about everyone that I loved would find me. I missed all of you and I missed writing. You would think that I would be sick of it. I write at the blog and I'm pushing 400 pages in my next book. I'm weird!
I know that I haven't posted much since my disaster but that is about to change. I'm going to rebuild and it going to be better than the first one. I guess practice makes perfect. So pardon the dust and lets see what kind of monster I can create! I just wonder if the six million dollar man had a bionic pee-pee!
Thanks for stopping over,

Friday, November 20, 2009


Every time I think I have something figured out, I screw it up. So first I would like to say sorry to everyone for all of the posts that have been sent to you because you subscribed to me!! UGH! Any ideas? I do want to reload everything but I'm not going to make you miserable because you know me. Why are you even friends with me?
Much love,
The stupid one

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Still trying!

Between my pouting and not wanting to believe that I did something so stupid, I'm slow to get started!! I promise(Francis) that I will be up and running by next week! So for now please, LOOK LEFT and subscribe to A Mom, Money, and More 2! That way you will know when I do post something!
I also have a new email address

Love you all!!

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Being Special

I'm alive and unmolested! Damn it! But I'm still sitting in the special section. It's very lonely here, I have the bleachers to myself.
Well, I deleted my blog. This was not intentional at all but in the end it is my mistake. I was trying to delete a test blog that I was using to help a friend and when I deleted it, EVERYTHING went with it. And yes, I cried. And yes, I missed you.
So the lesson in all of this is DON'T MAKE A MISTAKE ON BLOGGER! You get what you pay for and blogger is free. They don't have anyone to help you. They have a message board and I would say 90% of the peoples desperate pleas go unanswered. If you ever make a mistake, come see me if I haven't screwed up again and I'll help you. And never close the page, ever. If anyone out there knows a way to get a hold of an actual person at blogger, I will do anything for you. And I mean anything especially the naughty stuff.
I miss you terrible.
Love to all,

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Back to Reality

Now that the trip is over, it is kind of depressing to have real life set back in. Sometimes I wonder if it wouldn't be easier just not to go at all. Don't worry, there will be no wrist slicing here just a bit of pouting.
But it did get me thinking about our budget. Maybe my being cheap and this house has something to do with it. Some people live in sick houses, I live in the house that causes me to be cheap. It could be. I keep thinking about retiring on the beach and spending the rest of my days picking up shells and relaxing. My dream could come true but not anytime soon. I just think that I need to trim the budget a little more. Every penny I save now will get me one step closer to having sand between my toes. I started thinking about what I could do to save a dollar a day. It's been done to death but what about making it permanent. So trim $30 off of your budget forever! That's my goal for the month, to cut $30 off for good. And I'm issuing a challenge to all of you. Trim $30 in the next 30 days off of your budget and then use that $360 a year to pay off your bills and get you closer to your dream. Sand in your swim trunks sounds pretty inviting doesn't it. Please keep me posted on your progress and good luck!!
Thanks for stopping over,

Monday, October 26, 2009

Our Vacation!!

Just a quick run down of the trip! On Monday, we went to Universal Studios. WOW! It was great and they have a new coaster called Rockit. For all coaster enthusiasts, this is a must. The above picture is of the Mummy ride and it was great. And I got a free week ticket for Universal so I was in cheap heaven. I thought it was a great bargain for $99, you get a ticket that is good for a week and you can use it at both parks. The staff was super friendly, too. It's a much better deal than Disney but no matter what you still have to visit Magic Kingdom. It's a must if you go to FL, it may be the law.

-->On Tuesday, we went to Magic Kingdom. I couldn't believe that I was able to do two parks in two days. I was quite pleased with myself. And because it was the middle of October, the park was pretty empty. I think the longest we waited for a ride was 20 minutes. Bonus! And it was Den's birthday so he got in for free. He wore a birthday button and all the employees wished him happy birthday. He is shy but I think he liked it because he wore the button all day. People were calling out his name all day and stopping him, it was kind of like being married to a rock star for the day!

-->Wednesday, Den visited one of his friends that he used to work with. He has a strange form of lymphoma. It is triggered by cold weather. It is very odd but the doctors seem to have it under control. The kids and I stayed by the pool all day. It was so hot that it broke records. I couldn't ask for anything better. And since my brother is going to golf school in FL, we got to see him too. The above picture is from Thursday, when we went to Universal's Island of Adventure. It was another great park. We will be going back. All I can say is WOW, Universal has definitely has stepped it up. I was really impressed.

-->Friday our last day, we went to Ron Jon's bought some souvenirs and a body board.

-->The kids forgot to wear their suits and had to change in the trunk. And the kicker is, there was an officer in the parking lot watching and didn't have a problem with us putting our kids in the trunk and closing the lid. Just as long as we had money in the meter, it was all good! We had a great time body surfing and we all decided that we wanted to live on the beach. Not a bad dream!
I missed you all so much, thanks for not forgetting about me!

Love to all,

Tuesday, October 20, 2009


Hello everyone! I missed you so much. And I came to the conclusion that I like you all so much more than my family. After a week of being together, we need a vacation from each other. I am still trying to get back into the swing of things so I probably won't get back to regular posting until next week. But I can say that it was a great trip and we had a lot of fun. I missed you!!! Thank you all for the wonderful comments on my book. I love when you all feed my ego.;)
Lots of love,

Friday, October 16, 2009

Last Excerpt

I still miss you all!
This is the last excerpt from Dissipate.

Tom is the grocery store manager and Linda and Christine's boss.
Gerald Jr is the grocery store owner.

“Just give me a quarter,” Linda said.
Christine opened her purse and pulled out her change purse. She located
a quarter and held it out for Linda. She never looked her in the eye.
“I’m sick of you,” Linda said and yanked the quarter out of her hand.
Linda walked over to the pay phone next to the front doors of the grocery
store. She dropped the quarter in and punched in the numbers angrily.
“Why do I get stuck with all the terrible jobs?” Linda said very quietly to
Christine as she listened to the phone ring.
“Hey, I cleaned your house,” Christine shot back.
Linda gave Christine a dirty look.
“Hello?” A weak man’s voice answered.
“Hello, Mr. Smith. Could I please speak to Gerald Jr.?” Linda said.
“What?” the old man said.
“Gerald Jr.,” Linda yelled into the phone.
Christine started giggling loudly. Linda slipped her hand over the mouth
piece of the phone.
“Quiet,” Linda said in a motherly tone.
“He can’t hear you or me,” Christine laughed.
Linda shot her a dirty look.
“TALK TO GERALD JR.,” Linda yelled into the phone.
Christine’s laughter got louder. Linda shook her head no at Christine.
“WHAT?” the old man shouted into the phone. Linda yanked the phone
away from her ear with a grimace.
“Why is it when someone can’t hear, they shout too? He’s the one with the
hearing problem. Well, if he keeps shouting you’re going to be deaf too,”
Christine laughed rudely.
Linda giggled and then shot Christine a dirty look.
“GERALD JR.,” Linda shouted again. She yanked the phone from her ear
as soon as she finished speaking.
“WHERE?” He screamed into the phone.
Christine could hear him from where she was. Linda and Christine laughed
really loud. Linda didn’t even bother to cover the phone.
“SPEAK WITH GERALD!” Linda yelled into the phone.
“LICK IT WHO!” the confused man answered.
Christine and Linda were laughing so hard they had tears rolling down their
“You’re such a bitch. You’re just teasing the old man,” Christine laughed
as walked up next to Linda.
Christine got closer to the phone and started breathing heavily into it. Linda
was trying to push her away. She was having a hard time keeping her away
because the phone cord was so short.
“STOP IT!” Linda yelled at Christine.
“Oh God, I’m going to pee myself,” Christine said.
“TOPLESS WHAT!” the man said.
“GET AWAY FROM ME! I hope you pee all over yourself,” Linda said
as she pulled the phone away from Christine. Christine struggled with Linda
to keep her ear next to the phone.
“WHO THE HELL IS THIS?” a different man asked.
Linda and Christine’s eyes bugged out at each other.
“Is this Mr. Smith Jr.?” Linda asked with a cringe.
“YES and who is this, for the last time,” the new man said sternly.
“It’s Linda, sir,” Linda said sheepishly.
“Did you just call and tell my dad to pee on himself?” Gerald Jr. asked in
an unbelieving tone.
Christine covered her mouth with both hands and walked away very quickly.

Thanks for stopping over,

Thursday, October 15, 2009


Another excerpt from Dissipate!

“SHIT!” Jenny said loudly.
She got out of bed quickly and headed for the hall closet to get a towel to
soak it up with. When she got close to the bathroom she realized that the
shower was running. Cold fear ran over her.
“MOM!!” Jenny screamed as she ran full force into the bathroom.
“AHHHHH!!!” Linda screamed back.
Jenny ran right up and threw the shower curtain open. Her mother was
naked and very soapy. Jenny didn’t care all she wanted to do was save her.
She reached out and grabbed her mother by the arm and yanked with all of her
might. She lost her grip and her hands slid off of her mother’s arm. Linda not
sure what was going on and tried to fight Jenny off but couldn’t see for all the
soap in her eyes. The yank was still enough to catch her off balance. Linda
reached out to try and steady herself. All she managed to do was tangle herself
up in their cheap shower curtain. Linda fell out of the shower and made a soapy
splat sound when she hit the floor. Linda struggled to cover herself with the
mangled slick shower curtain.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!” Linda yelled. She was
trying to look up at Jenny but her soapy hair was plastered to her face. With
a violent sweep of her hand, she shoved all of her hair out of her face.
“YOU’RE GOD DAMN CRAZY! What are you doing?” Linda said as
she tried to carefully pull herself up.
A large soapy puddle was forming around Linda’s feet and water was
spraying out of the shower because there was no curtain to hold it in.
“I’m not really sure what I’m doing,” Jenny said as she stared at her mother.
Jenny’s mouth was slightly open; she did not believe what she had just done.
Jenny thought that maybe some of the bubbles around her mother’s mouth
were not soap but maybe she had started foaming from anger.
“I really want to know what is going on with you,” Linda said extremely
“How about we shut the water off and then we can talk about it in the
kitchen?” Jenny suggested.
“I’m going to finish my shower first. I can’t walk into the kitchen like this,”
Linda said as she glanced down. She had rearranged the shower curtain so it
looked more like a toga. The shower curtain was an overly bright and
aggressive flower pattern. Linda kept wiping the bubbles from her face but it
was not helping and her eyes were now stinging terribly.
“Mom, please I really don’t think that you need to get back in the shower.
How about you just finish rinsing off with some of the water we saved in the
containers?” Jenny said hopefully.
“Let me get this straight, you just yanked me out of the shower bare-assed
naked to try and get me to bathe in a bucket,” Linda said. Her right eye was
now stinging so badly that it looked like she was just continuously winking at
Jenny was now having a hard time not smiling about the whole situation. She
yanked her very naked mother out of the shower. And her mom was wearing
their ugly shower curtain and it looked like she was hitting on her.
“Mom, I don’t know what came over me. I really have lost my mind,” Jenny
said and stifled a laugh.
“Are you laughing at me?” Linda said even angrier.

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Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

This isn't wicked at all! A.Marie you have my permission. But I can't think of a better way to spend the next 8 minutes of your life. I got tired just watching this!
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PS I won't get you answer your emails until next week.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009


Still missing you all! Here is a little bit more from the book.

“What are you coloring?” Jenny asked Kate after a while. From where she
was sitting, she could see Kate but her body was shielding the picture from
Kate turned and smiled at Jenny. And then went back to coloring. When
she finished, she stood up and walked over to Jenny still on the couch. Kate
grabbed her hand and tugged lightly. She wanted Jenny to follow her.
“How about we just sit here for a while?” Jenny suggested.
“No,” Kate said. Kate tugged her hand a little harder.
“Just sit here and cuddle me for a while,” Jenny said and patted the couch
with her other hand.
Kate let go of Jenny’s hand and started to walk away.
“Hey, stay here sweetie. You know what happened last time you went
down the hall,” Jenny called after Kate.
Kate ignored her and kept walking down the hall with her picture.
“Do you want something else from your bedroom?” Jenny said as she
hurriedly got up from the couch and followed Kate.
Kate stopped at the bathroom door.
“Honey, what do you want?” Jenny asked as she peered down at Kate.
Kate grabbed Jenny’s hand.
“What is it?’ Jenny asked.
Kate looked up at Jenny and stared into her eyes, she squeezed her hand
slightly. Kate walked into the bathroom a few steps and pulled Jenny in with
her. Jenny flipped the light switch on.
“Are you afraid?” Jenny asked still puzzled.
Kate looked back up at Jenny with fear in her eyes.
“Honey, you don’t need to be afraid of the bathroom. Nothing is going to
hurt you. The pipes are broken. I’m sure that someone is going to fix it real
soon. Okay, so you don’t have to be afraid any more,” Jenny said in her most
reassuring voice.
Kate gave Jenny a slight smile and stepped closer to the tub, never letting
go of Jenny’s hand. Jenny stepped closer to the tub. Jenny and Kate both stared
down the drain of the tub. Kate tugged at Jenny’s hand.
“What is it, sweetie?” Jenny asked. Kate handed Jenny the picture she had
colored. Jenny slowly looked at the picture. She caught her breathe and a cold
chill ran down her body when she realized what Kate had drawn. The picture
was of a poorly scribbled gray body, with large red eyes.
“OH, God,” Jenny said. She was starting to feel weak, the room was going

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Monday, October 12, 2009

Something Different

Since I'm gone this week I'm going to take a few excerpts from my book. Just my disclaimer, I am not the greatest author and my editing sucks but it still feels like Christmas when I hold the book. I hope you like it. And I miss you, guys. I'm sure that we are fighting like cats and dogs and I'm gripping about going all the way to Florida to fight. And that we should have saved the money and fought at home, sounds about right!

Just to make sense of it all
Linda is the mom
Jenny is Linda's daughter
Christine is Linda's best friend
Kate is Christine's daughter
That may have made it worse!!!

“Yes! You two are really being bad tonight. The noise is back in the
bathroom! I was under the sink putting the toys away and I could hear that noise
coming from the pipes under the sink. REMEMBER!” Jenny said.
“No, I don’t think I heard anything,” Christine answered.
“You don’t think at all. Ha ha,” Linda joked.
Jenny just shook her head. It was like listening to an old married couple
sometimes. Linda and Christine had even lost Kate’s interest. Kate got a few
baby dolls and went back to sitting on the couch and watching cartoons. Jenny
decided to see if she could hear the noise in the kitchen. Her mom and Christine
had finished cleaning up the kitchen and everything was back in place. Too bad
mom didn’t try so hard to keep our house as neat, Jenny thought. She
walked over to the sink. Jenny flipped on the faucet. No noise. She opened the
cabinet under the sink and listened. All she could hear was the rushing noise
of the draining water. She stood back up and shut the water off. She listened
again under the sink with the water off. Nothing.
She walked back to the front room where her mom and Christine had
managed to get on the couches. They were both sitting with their feet propped
up with full glasses of wine. They both seemed a little more sober. I guess
being snatched bald in a couple of spots will sober you up, Jenny thought.
“Mom, it’s not making that noise in the kitchen. What do you think it is?”
Jenny asked.
“Well, we decided that we aren’t plumbers, but we think that it might have
something to do with water pressure. It seems to keep happening when you
run a couple of faucets at a time. I think the whole city gets it water from large
wells, so maybe they are going dry. It is probably happening all over town,”
Linda suggested in a surprisingly sober tone.
Jenny just smiled and nodded. She went back to the bathroom to finish
cleaning up. She wasn’t done investigating yet. When she got back in the
bathroom she turned the sink back on. No noise from the faucet or under the
sink. She left the water running and walked over to the tub. She turned on the
tub faucet. No noise. She shut the tub faucet off and walked back over and shut
the sink off too.
So much for your theory, mom, Jenny thought to herself.
Jenny wiped off the bathroom sink with the hand towel and then hung it back
up. She walked over to the bathtub to drain the tub. She reached down and
pulled the plug out. The screeching high pitched whistle started as soon as the
plug left the tub. The noise reverberated through Jenny’s skull. Still stooped
over, she stared at the tub drain as she held her ears. Jenny watched as a red
eye peered back at her from the drain hole. Jenny blinked hard trying to clear
the vision from her eyes. She wasn’t seeing things, it was still there. A gray
bony transparent hand quickly reached for her. She was far enough back that
it just made a quick swipe at her and vanished back down the drain. Jenny
threw herself backward. The sound died down but over the screeching noise
she thought she heard someone screaming for help.
I’ve gone mad, Jenny thought to herself. Just then Christine and her mom
came in the bathroom. Jenny stood perfectly still and stared at the drain. All
color had left her face and she was taking shallow breaths.

Thanks for stopping by,

Friday, October 9, 2009

Friend's Friday

My booger for the day is ida_pai from Thailand. Her blog Travel Thailand has amazing pictures on it. You have to jump over there just to see it, it makes me really want to travel the globe. Have a great Friday, SonyaAnn

Thursday, October 8, 2009


Good news, we got a ReStore store. ReStore is run by Habitat for Humanity and collects and sells new and used building materials but I'm sure that you already knew this.
Anywho, remember our garage door debacle. I have managed to save up $750 to replace it but I have been dragging my feet on getting it or should I say dragging Den's feet since he is the one that is going to be doing it. It looks like the $750 might be on the low side for a new door. Sure, we could get a really cheap door but it looks like we will never escape this house so why not fix it up, sort of, nice. I luckily found the ReStore so that may be the way that we are going to go. We went and talked to the manager and he said if we can wait about a month they should be getting some in. They are reorganizing now so they have room for bigger things like the garage doors. Now all we have to do is hope and pray that the old door will make it a bit longer.
Thanks for coming to see me,

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

I've gone too far, sorry to say but you knew it would happen. A.Marie you can go here, everyone else go here! Or to find out how truly perverse I really am, watch A.Marie's first and then the other one! I ruin everything.
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Thank You

I wanted to say a huge thank you to Frances over at Looking forward to a more frugal 2009 for the wonderful Success Rice coupon! Yum and your butt is hot!

--> And a thank you to hatchette book group and Pam over at Mom's Muttering for the new book with the sexy cover!
I'm such a wiener!
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Tuesday, October 6, 2009

I have an idea

God save us all when I mutter those words! Can you take frugal too far? I'm thinking no but we shall see. As you know, we are going to FL soon. My original plan was to take two suitcases and just cram everything in there. The flaw to this plan was pointed out by dearest DJ. Where were all of the souvenirs going to go? Fine, we can bring three cases and I'll just gripe a bit, fine a lot! My clothes are bunking with Anna's clothes. Her and I fight about everything else in this world but when we pack for a trip, we are united. The boys are messy and we are neat and tidy with our clothes. And everything the boys have should fit in their suitcase. So on the way down there, there won't be much in one case. So I was thinking tons of snacks, the things that we never get. You know, cereal bowls, expensive granola and everything else that I deny my family because of the cost. Is that crazy? These are the things that kill our budget every time we travel. We have no self control when we have to stop and just grab a snack. But I will be paying $15 to bring a piece of luggage full of food to FL. I mean they do have food there and we could just bring less clothes and I could do more laundry. That would save space for the souvenirs. I also had a another idea, our luggage fits inside of each other. What if I put everything in one of the smaller pieces and then put it in the bigger piece. Would that cause a problem? As long as it doesn't go over the weight limit, what would it hurt? And I would only have to pay for three pieces on the way back. Any ideas? But I have to say that I think this is a good problem to have.
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Monday, October 5, 2009

Good News?

Some will dispute this but we are getting a health care clinic at Walmart and I'm so grateful. Most of the things that we need to go to the doctor for are infections, you know the fun stuff, sinuses and bronchitis. I don't know what the prices are going to be in Antioch but the only other Walmart clinic in IL starts at $40. Our HMO deductable is $30 so it really might be worth it to pay the extra $10 and not have all the hassle. Maybe we should just start looking at our insurance as major medical coverage only and then we are on our own with the little things. But then maybe that's what they want.
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Friday, October 2, 2009

Friend's Friday

So my Friday Friend is Slugmama over at Don't Read This; It's Boring! I can't believe all the money that she has saved this year. Check her out. And I hope that all of you have a great weekend.
Thanks for stopping by,

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Cheap Hors de ordervs

This is great! The next time I'm going to a party or a quick get together, I'm making this. I'm such a cheap cheat! Say that fast 10 times. Use old french bread, slice it and then toast it a bit. Mix chopped tomatoes, fresh basil and any kind of vinaigrette salad dressing together. And just spoon it on the bread. It looks like something from an expensive French restaurant but really its just your leftover stale bread. Do you have any cheats like this?
Thanks for coming to see me,

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Wicked Wednesday!!

This wicked Wednesday is thanks to slugmama! And A.Marie you are good to go this week! This isn't naughty a bit but it's slight man insulting so I'm love it! Click here!
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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

More Cleaning

As I've said before, I FEEL better! I really feel like shouting that out at times. I still have some tired days but for the most part, I'm doing so much better. Anyways, I'm cleaning another house. We need the cash and I figure with Anna going to college in less than a year, we are going to need every penny that we can get. So I made a backpack O' clean. I put everything that I need to clean in it and I'm just bring that with me. I'm cleaning with the spray for Jessie but instead of Borax, I'm using anti-bacterial soap with the hydrogen peroxide. And then vinegar with water and a squirt of dish soap for counters and mirrors. And then last but not least, I'm using microfiber clothes(not in the kitchen or bathrooms). Just putting it together in the bag has helped so much. I just drop it in a convenient spot about midway and then I don't have to keep running back and forth to get something I need. And when I'm vacuuming my way out of her house, I keep the wet microfiber cloth in my pocket and wipe anything that I have missed. So if you have any tips that you use for cleaning, please let me know. Also, send me some prayers/good vibes that I can find a couple more houses to clean. My in laws live in a retirement community so all of the houses are ranches so it is so much easier to clean. And because I love to talk, I'm a real hit. A lot of the people are lonely so I stand around and gab for a while. And the best part is I actually feel better the next day from all the exercise. And that has never happened before.
So if you have any prayers/ideas leave me a comment.
Thanks for everything,

Monday, September 28, 2009

Green Balls

Green balls, it sounds like some kind of terrible disease caught from a street walker. I was just wondering if anyone had tried this product. I saw it on tv the other day and thought this was a really great invention, if it worked. You just wash your clothes on the spin cycle and you're done. They also said that they have on for the dishwasher, too. So, I'm once again in need of help. I was just wondering if any of you have tried it. I would trust you over some comments posted somewhere on the web.
Thanks for coming to see me and helping me out,

Friday, September 25, 2009

Friend's Friday

So my newest booger is JennyMac from Let's have a cocktail! She is quite the popular girl and I'm thankful that she stopped over and said Hi! So check out her site and meet my newest booger.
Have a great weekend,

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Little Christmas Gifts

This is a really good find. We do our monthly grocery shopping at Woodman's in Kenosha WI. There is an outlet strip mall on the way up there that we stop at every once in a while. So one of the shops is a Ghirardelli's. They have a special, all the chocolate squares you can get in the bag for $15. Den and I have found a new hobby, stuffing candy neatly in a bag. People were even asking us for tips. We stuffed 105 in the bag pictured above. If you buy one of their premade bags they give you 50 for $15. We are going to do this for Christmas and tie 3 or 4 of these together with some curling ribbon. He likes to give everyone at work a little something and this would be fun, easy and super cheap. So if you are looking for some creative gifts for the holidays check out the outlet stores. Any other ideas?
Thanks for coming to see me,